What diet do I choose and will this finally be the year where I get it right and never have to diet ever again?
I’m now 40, married and happy, so happy in fact I’ll munch away on anything but try to change 40 years of good living and there’s bound to be some resistance so this year I’m celebrating a little bit of what you fancy does you good.
Now I have the ingredients and principles for that down to a fine art, what I don’t have is portion control. I have a diet plate that hosts Chinese meals on a weekly basis, an exercise ball that makes a great table, weights that may be useful if the bed ever breaks and a set of shiny kitchen scales that look good in the kitchen and hold my spare car keys.
My bodyweight scales are tempremental and so is my floor. I can weigh myself in two different places at the same time and there’s a stone of a difference. Of course I’ll say I’m the smaller of the two, open the fridge and munch into a healthy high carb snack ahem.
Yes I love carbs, they’re cheap, cheerful, make me smile and very very tasty, especially deep fried. But I also love protein, especially steak. The thing is one complements the other, don’t tell me to eat steak with healthy salad, I’ll do that anyway but its sacrilege to bin the onion rings and French fries and the peppercorn sauce,
My work routine is a bit mental, I can’t cook bacon and eggs for breakfast, can barely get the dog out a walk before getting ready for work and quite often I travel around. Well there’s another dilemma, have you seen the price of tasteless airport food? So cheap as chips is handy in these situations where a bottle of water can quite often bankrupt you. All these yuppy duppies in their business suits eating high class meals on their expense accounts! Meanwhile as a charity worker I’m looking for bargains in WH Smith. I’d be lost without a ginsters sausage roll and a grab bag from Walkers.
So come pay day, I aim to use my new diary to the max, organise the ass out of everything, exercise till my legs don’t work (this week’s target is already in the bag) and swim like a fish to get a waist Kate skinny witsherface would die for.
Yawn, is it time to wake up yet?
I’m now 40, married and happy, so happy in fact I’ll munch away on anything but try to change 40 years of good living and there’s bound to be some resistance so this year I’m celebrating a little bit of what you fancy does you good.
Now I have the ingredients and principles for that down to a fine art, what I don’t have is portion control. I have a diet plate that hosts Chinese meals on a weekly basis, an exercise ball that makes a great table, weights that may be useful if the bed ever breaks and a set of shiny kitchen scales that look good in the kitchen and hold my spare car keys.
My bodyweight scales are tempremental and so is my floor. I can weigh myself in two different places at the same time and there’s a stone of a difference. Of course I’ll say I’m the smaller of the two, open the fridge and munch into a healthy high carb snack ahem.
Yes I love carbs, they’re cheap, cheerful, make me smile and very very tasty, especially deep fried. But I also love protein, especially steak. The thing is one complements the other, don’t tell me to eat steak with healthy salad, I’ll do that anyway but its sacrilege to bin the onion rings and French fries and the peppercorn sauce,
My work routine is a bit mental, I can’t cook bacon and eggs for breakfast, can barely get the dog out a walk before getting ready for work and quite often I travel around. Well there’s another dilemma, have you seen the price of tasteless airport food? So cheap as chips is handy in these situations where a bottle of water can quite often bankrupt you. All these yuppy duppies in their business suits eating high class meals on their expense accounts! Meanwhile as a charity worker I’m looking for bargains in WH Smith. I’d be lost without a ginsters sausage roll and a grab bag from Walkers.
So come pay day, I aim to use my new diary to the max, organise the ass out of everything, exercise till my legs don’t work (this week’s target is already in the bag) and swim like a fish to get a waist Kate skinny witsherface would die for.
Yawn, is it time to wake up yet?
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